24th-26th November 2006


Many thanks to everyone who attended this year’s Westminster Ishinryu Winter Course in the Forest of Dean. Most people appeared to enjoy themselves both during the many hours of training and also off the field. My course once again started at the hire shop where I collect a full sized 17 seater minibus. This turned out to be an excellent choice. Not only was I able get all the London area course participants to Wales, it also meant I qualified to use bus lanes. There’s nothing quite as gratifying as doing 40mph down the inside of the traffic queue while your passengers swig beer and gloat out of the windows at the other static drivers.

Sadly we were yet again let down by the warm weather conditions which meant that even the heavy rain felt almost like a warm shower on Saturdays first training session. The heavy rain and lack of frost had the main training field completely sodden. This allowed near ankle deep mud to be churned up forming a layer of slime to test your footing (Sensei has always said we should be solid in our stances even on boggy ground… I think we went a long way to prove it)

In total we had five independent training sessions during the weekend. Three were taken by Sensei Prasad in the muddy field and covered many elements of traditional karate training. One session was handed to Sensei Mike Reay who took us through some basic escapes from grabs and holds that he picked from his large Jiu-Jitsu repertoire. For the final session Sensei Prasad guided us onto the narrow paths of the forest. When we eventually emerged again we were tired, wet and mud streaked but happy

Once again I have tried to record the event for history by sneakily noting peoples (sometimes very private) conversations and comments, both on and off the field (your suspicions are right… deep down I am truly evil!). In my usual tradition I have taken quotes out of contexts or made minor “improvements” to satisfy my own sick version of humour.

1.     "I’m not sure where he went but I think he might have gone to see that baldy bloke"

2.     "Is that rain wet?"

3.     "I only found out what ATM was last week… I’ve learnt lots since I met him"

4.     "Would either of you ladies like to touch my lump? It’s a big one!"

5.     "So the training starts in the dark at 6am on that field… but hang on! What if it’s raining?"

6.     "If you haven’t ridden in a bus while someone has p*ss in a beer can you haven’t lived"

7.     "I wasn’t sure how to do the kata so I thought I’d stop and watch everyone else for a while"

8.     "I’m like a freak of nature… I’m a bit like Johnny Morris… but with a special voice"

9.     "I’d have Alyssa Milano… I mean I would if I swung that way"

10.     "Ouch! That actually hurt going down… whatever it was I just swallowed"

11.     "They do Brazilians in there… I took a leaflet to see if I could get a discount for leaving some bits hairy but then I spotted it said ‘not men!’ in brackets"

12.     "You said it would be horrible but I quite enjoyed it really even though my bum hurts now"

Many thanks to all those who attended for training hard and also for making it a good time
Karl Green

Quotes revealed:
1.Amy. – 2.Allan. – 3.Gillian. – 4.Karl. – 5.Susan S. – 6.Darren. – 7.Susan D. – 8.Mike R. – 9.Salina. – 10.Steve. – 11.John. – 12.Catherine

Karl Green can easily be contacted with any complaints that you have been annoyed, taken offence or caused embarrassment by these quotes, you will however be completely ignored and you can rest assured that there are absolutely “NO REFUNDS”